Yeah, we hear that all the time…you have to love yourself first before you can truly achieve what you want and to love others fully…….
But, it isn't that easy!
We see it everywhere….LOVE YOURSELF!
It shouts at us from billboards, it’s everywhere on social media….on sweaters and on the walls of cafes…..Friends and family who have our very best interests at heart…all say LOVE YOURSELF! It’s the key, it's the first step to happiness….Even the role models from TV and the media preach at us….They say it’s the one thing that we need to know…..and they show us the best version of self-love…OR DO THEY?
Do you struggle with self-love?
We think to ourselves…“All I have to do is love myself…” …..and before we can even begin to think that this is easy…a little lump begins to form in the back of our throats…
I know this feeling all too well….because what we hear when someone asks “What do your love about yourself?” is….
Actually, immediately you start to think…….of all the things that you don't accept and love about yourself…..It’s hard because instantly, the brain goes into the negative as opposed to the positive. Weird huh?
Meditate your way to self-love…….really?
One of my first mentors told me…“Regan, you have to meditate and then you will get to a place of peace, and in that moment you will feel self-love.”
Soooooo….I would sit down each and every day and try so hard to get to this place of self-love…but the negative thoughts would still swirl around in my head, and I never achieved that place of true enough peace to be that person. It just didn't work for me!
So, if meditating to THAT place isn't for you right now…then I have a cool self-process, that I’ve devised for you to deep dive into.
Try this route instead….
Look at yourself in the mirror….and stare deeply into your own eyes. Hold your own gaze. This may, in fact be the first time that you are really, truly seeing yourself. This beautiful, flawed person that you are. A person with a soul and with real human vulnerabilities and emotions.
From this place, take a few deep breaths and keep looking at yourself. The person looking back at you is the person that you are with when you wake up, the person you will be during the day and the person who will be there when you go to sleep. And having an open, honest relationship with THIS person is the key to having open, honest relationships with all others in life.
Just three, simple, powerful things…
After you have taken a few deep breaths, say something positive that you think about this person, this reflection looking back at you…and then say three more things….three powerful, amazing, incredible things about yourself…to that reflection.
And when the negative thoughts come up, try and alternate them and shift them into a positive thing…..instead of saying “You have no idea what you are doing…” switch it to the positive and say……
“You have so much to learn and gain from this new experience, from this new knowledge.”
BE KIND TO YOURSELF
Yes, be kind to yourself, be gentle on yourself. You are growing, you are changing…..You are starting the journey to self-love.
Starting with this process in the mirror helped me see myself. It helped me to believe that I could actually become the woman that I wanted to become, the woman that I desired to be.
And that woman…she was inside of me the whole time.
Want to know more? #Askregan
You Absolutely Can Have it all
…and you can give back as well.